Goodbye Twenties

With a few days to go, I s’pose I must do a Farewell to the Twenties thing. So here's a list.

You know you’re turning 30 when –

- you get emails from your girlfriends that say “Hi Ladies”

- your hair is turning grey and you don’t give a shit. L’Oreal invented hair color for a reason.

- you see other fat women in the gym and feel pure joy. Who skinny women?

- you develop a thick rhino's hide. That way when you're all dressed up in the morning and the husband says your top is like a parachute, you don't get your feelings hurt. In your twenties, that comment has day-destroying implications.

- you're right in the middle of puberty and hot flashes. And while one is a distant, distant memory you hope the other is a faraway future.

- you know that a good handbag is an investment. And you’re willing to pay the price.

- you say “No” after the second glass of wine. Really, getting drunk is so twenties.

- you see old episodes of F.R.I.E.N.D.S and remember your college days.

- there are people praying for your first born child.

- on the subject of children, all your friends have one. Or two. And those who don’t are on their way.

- you hate the mall. Too many high school kids and not enough free food sampling.

- a really romantic night is a home cooked meal by the husband and a good movie on TV.

- you can afford to be a Drama Queen.

- someone said to you "Welcome to the Big Boys Club"

Goodbye Twenties. It was fun.